Wearing my boyfriend style blazer with a cup of Yorkshire tea, I sit here in my Nans lavender painted sitting room with only the sound of her 15 year old clock ticking.
You see, yesterday she had to go into hospital (due to dehydration and severe stomach pains) but she refused to stay the night because she informed the doctor that she ‘loves her own bed too much’. She got her way of course, so after x-rays, blood tests and urine samples she was back in the comfort of her own home. Winniefred is 5’4, always wears blue cardigans and travels Europe armed with her travel journal and packet of humbugs (the gypsy thing must run in the family) She hasn’t been ill in 50 years so it came as a shock to the family when the usual energetic wench called us to say she wasn’t feeling too good. Turns out, she over-indulged on her 2 week holiday and hadn’t drank any water for days!

So, I woke early this morning, headed to town in the sunshine and bought her a bottle of Evian, packet of fruit and a magazine. She seemed really pleased to see me and of course, I wanted to make sure that she was ok. I suppose situations like this makes you want to appreciate the ones you love a little more. Fingers crossed she’ll be ok soon and packing her suitcase to Timbuktu.

Keeping on the subject of traveling, London guy came home from his 6 month cruise (which seemed like 6 years) he sent me a few messages informing me on his return and that we have ‘some catching up to do’. After out first meeting in December 2006, we would continue to meet up every so often, so I was quite sad about not being able to see him again for a very long time but proud of him for getting the job and being able to perform on stage each night. London guy, well (I say with a smile) he does look like a young Robert Downy Junior and after we spent hours chatting over a hot chocolate at Christmas time, I was besotted. I know, all this talk about men I must sound as if I fall in love every 2 minutes? Surprisingly, I’ve only been head over heels three times in all of my life. However, I’m in two minds whether to meet up with ‘Downy Junior’ again, because he is the type of guy that you want to be in love with and even his smile makes me feel all ‘weak at the knees’. We live miles apart and I really do not want to go through the whole ‘distance’ problem for the hundredth time this year. I’ve learnt my lesson and I honestly think my poor heart needs a rest from all of the thumping.

Like Déjà vu, I bumped into ‘Rocker Guys’ mum. The great thing is, she has such a warm soul, down to earth and extremely friendly. The bad thing is, she always seems to walk into my life when I’m in the middle of walking out of her sons. With a smile on her face (and her house being a walk away) she beamed ‘Come in for a quick cup of tea?’ I don’t know why I agreed because I’ve been an ‘ex girlfriend’ for 2 months. Even though our families know one another, it still is strange to be drinking tea with my ex boyfriends mother. Fuck, I must sound like one of those crazy bunny boilers (which I’m far from) As I walked towards her house, I kept repeating the words ‘run away, run away’ in my mind whilst kicking myself and wondering why I didn’t just say I was busy? (which I wasn’t as I was heading back home) but before I could change my mind, the kettle was boiling and the hobnob biscuits were out the cupboard. Even his dad was there too (they’re divorced but he still visits her for Erm…DIY reasons?) So, picture this, all three of us sitting in the lounge having a chat about life and the pair of them apologising for their son’s behaviour. ‘He’s always been a funny one!’ ‘He’ll be contacting you when he gets home’ ‘He’s just like his uncle’ ‘He even ignores our calls!’. The words were floating around the room, but all I could do was smile politely and stare at the clock. The funny thing is, I feel so comfortable around them and can sit there at ease and not have to interrupt the silences. However, I think his dad noticed me staring at the clock because he offered to give me a lift home (which I accepted straight away) I know that ‘rocker guy’ will find out that I was at his mums house, he must think I’m one of those clingy girlfriends who cannot let go but in fact, it’s his own mother that still continues to send me emails and text messages asking me if I want to spend the day together.

Note to oneself- Elle, just say No...Simple

I’ve just devoured a bowl of porridge with raisins, the sun is beaming through the window and I’m feeling extremely positive today. I want to get rid of all of the negative energy that has surrounded me for the past few weeks. I’m proud of myself for finally giving up on making effort with ‘him’. You see, I’m not a quitter but certain things in life we just have to put a full stop and forget (and ALWAYS say NO to eager ex mother in laws!)

…Right,time to steal some mints and head back into town.