The hunger for love is much more difficult to remove than the hunger for bread -Mother Teresa
I was greeted by the beautiful sunshine this morning, beaming through my window. I was determined not to waste the day indoors again; therefore I put on some red lipstick and walked into town. I spent an hour or so browsing and surprisingly I found a pair of brown gladiator sandals for only 6 pound!! (which of course I happily purchased) Just as I was about to walk back home, I bumped into my Grandparents. You see, ever since my father passed away they haven't really been around much. It's as if they couldn't cope with his death, so closed off from the whole family. I always feel quite awkward around them, it's as if I never know what to talk about, so I just give them both a hug and try and make it quick. It's quite heartbreaking to be honest, as I have so many beautiful memories of them. However, they pushed us away and even after 10 years they still continue to do so...
Anyway, when I returned home I spent the rest of the afternoon in the garden with Grazia magazine and green tea. We decided to have a BBQ a few hours later, so whilst the food cooked (smelling amazing!) we sat around and chatted for a while, just as the sun was setting. It was lovely to spend time with the family (without the rows and uni stress)
The boss called, informing me that I start work on Saturday. However, she wanted me to go into the store on Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday & Friday to help out with stock. As it's my 21st birthday on Wednesday (hmmm cake!) the boyfriend has various surprises lined up. Therefore, I had to tell her that I couldn't help out on Tuesday or Wednesday! I felt rather silly, as I was telling my new boss that I couldn't even make it on the first day! Hmmm, I doubt anyone would want to spend their birthday picking up boxes of course...
Its my last week of unemployment. Thank fuck. I only have to work for 3 months, as university begins and I get to spend the next 3 years of my life being a lazy student (armed with a laptop and a can of Heinz beans) Maybe I should get a job in a coffee shop too? As all of those late night studying sessions will require a lot of caffeine! Of course the staff discount will help too, as I'll more than likely be poor, after spending my loan on dresses and shoes from asos.com (tut tut)...
Keeping on the subject of asos.com, I ordered a beautiful blue dress (that I shall be wearing for my birthday meal) however, I purchased a size 10 (as usually their dresses are really tiny and I always feel rather fat, after squeezing my arse into a size 8) Anyway, it's far too big and I have completely forgotten that over the past 9 months, I have lost half a stone, therefore I am in fact an asos size 8. Rather than sending it back (as I honestly cannot be bothered to fold, pack and post) I have decided to do it the 1950s housewife way and sew the damn thing...
As it was the 125th birthday of Marks & Spencer's, I was informed that many items would be 1p! (Bargain!) So, I enthusiastically skipped into the city on Wednesday morning, with my sister and of course the 4'9, 67 year old bargain hunter Grandmother called Winifred (the Grandparent that didn't ignore us for 10 years of course!) So, we arrived at 9am and waited in the extremely long queue for what seemed like forever! Unsurprisingly, the Grandmother had a pocket full of mints! So as we stood there sucking on humbugs in the morning sunshine, we realised that a photographer was standing in front of the crowds, taking pictures. I didn't know whether to smile or hide! However, I wasn't too keen on the idea of being known as the local M&S eager bargain beaver! When we finally entered the shop (50 minutes later) we were sadly informed that the only items left were either a packet of sweets, a frisby or a beach ball!!??? (I must say I felt extremely disappointed) We were able to pick 5 items each, so of course I opted for the 'food glorious food' but as I realised I must have looked extremely greedy, I politely asked for a frisby too...
After almost a year of being with my boyfriend, I am still so completely in love. I remember when I realised I had fallen in love, it was around September 2008 and he was sat there in his grey cosy trousers, sipping peppermint tea out of his huge starbucks mug and singing along to Jack Johnson. I was so besotted and realised that I loved everything about him. His smile, his laugh, his big blue eyes, his pouty lips, the way he sang and got the lyrics wrong, his smell, his voice, his beautiful mind and even the way he held his spoon (he wraps his whole hand around it! If a bear ate porridge, then I'm sure it would eat it that way!) We had quite a hard time during the winter, but I suppose it made me realise just how much I care for him. We both were in the wrong at one point, but with our trust issues in the past, our own insecurities got in the way and caused a lot of stress on the relationship. Thankfully, we got through it even stronger than ever and now continue to be extremely happy with one another. I didn't think it was possible to feel this way about somebody, but I'm just going to embrace it all, as life is far too short to hide away your feelings. Love is so important and at times we need to take risks and allow our hearts to fly away and find it...
Hopefully the sunshine shall return tomorrow, as I think a Sunday picnic with the boyfriend will be perfect. Hmmm right, time to apply a chocolate facemask and perhaps stare at Angelina Jolie pictures...
Goodnight x
